Occasionally, in times of worry, I’ve longed to be stylish, but on second thought I say no-just let me be myself-and express rough, yet true things with rough workmanship. – Vincent Van Gogh
“Six pages in, why am I having second thoughts now?!
Right. Let’s get this straight. Am I having second thoughts about creating another children’s book (since the first two aren’t exactly bestsellers)? No. It’s therapeutic for me and putting it out there is better than wondering ‘what ifs’ in the future.
Am I having second thoughts about the title and/or storyline? About what I have written? No and no. I am actually quite happy with it. I think it’s pretty good if I may say so myself.
Am I having second thoughts about my illustrations? …… Yes. Not that it’s terrible. I am actually quite proud because I am not good at art or drawing stuff and yet I am able to create pretty good digital illustrations. And using a mouse too I might add.
So what is wrong then? Why the second thoughts? Well, six pages in but for some reason, I seem to keep going back to page five. Something about it is not perfect to me. So I have been redoing it over and over. Trying to create the perfect image for that part of my story. And the more I try, the less sure I become of the style I have chosen for my illustrations. The more I try to fix page five, this new style that showed up in my head becomes more and more appealing to me. The more I find this new idea appealing, the more page five becomes unsatisfactory and will never be perfect no matter how many times I change it.
I guess I just have to try to create an illustration of this new idea and see how I feel about it?
Come on! This is not a marriage! Okay if I really want to make a comparison… If this was marriage, it’s not the marriage or getting married that I am having second thoughts on. It’s just the wedding venue that I am not completely sold on. That’s all. If I heard about another fabulous wedding venue, what would I have done? I would at least go there, take a look and see how I feel about it.
There you go then. Sure it might take up more of my time but at least, once I have both styles of illustrations in front of me, I can finally make a choice. I can decide for sure which one I really want to use and move forward with a clear head and stay focused.
Alright then. Let’s get this new idea out of my head and on to my computer screen.”
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